Explaining Obedience

There is a common misconception concerning obedience. Obedience isn't a dictatorship of adults (parents). And if it's viewed as such, there's one of two things wrong: either parents are abusing the God-given leadership and authority(which is unlikely; not impossible. Unfortunately being a parent doesn't always mean you know what you're doing.) Or, we as their children do not have our hearts where they need to be.God had it all sorted out on how it needed to be when he set up the family unit. He made it so we, the kids, don't have to be in charge, so take a load off. We have this amazing opportunity to train on being in charge, and there are times when mum and pop entrust us for a test run. Those are often some of the best sibling bonding times. :) Obedience, isn't always fun. And often, I have to make myself obey what my parents have asked, until eventually, (and depending on what it is, it might take years..) it becomes second nature. For instance, when I was a child, mum and pop always forbid me from touching the outlet. As a young child, (and mum's youngest walker) I didn't understand why. And it took me testing a few times to learn not to touch the outlet. When I got older, I learned that it was dangerous. And when I got even older, I understood why. My parents wouldn't ask me to do or not to do something if it wasn't going to be for my best interest.

The main point of this post, is because I recently had a friend ask why I wasn't planning on moving out in a year to attend college. I'll be honest, these are often my least favorite questions to answer. I often feel that since I'm not doing what most of my friends are, that I'm doing something wrong. Even though, it aligns with my parents requests. (My family is a bit of an oddity with the way we do things.)

I tried, briefly, to explain to my friend that, teen hood is "training time" for adulthood. Kids who want to be doctors, pour a lot of their study time into chemistry and biology, kids who want to do any kind of building and design pay special attention in geometry, and etc. I've always wanted to be a wife and mum. I sometimes feel silly saying that at only 17; but don't underestimate the power of God-placed desires.

My eldest sister went to med. school, did super well, and was a pediatric nurse for several years. I don't think that furthering education is wrong, I just think it's not for me. My parents will back and support any one of us that want to get a collage education. But they've asked that we not move out to do so. We have several community collages in the area, online courses available, and collages near by. Education isn't quite so far as we think. And I honestly feel like the, grade-school, then middle-school, then high school, then collage pattern/rut our culture has fallen into is most annoying to those of us who choose to break it after high school. But that's a bunny trail.

Anyways, I just wanted to be clear, that I don't think collage is wrong in general; it's just not right for me.

All that said, I wanted to I guess just vocalize why I'm not going to collage, and why I'm not going to further my education.

As previously stated, my family does things differently than most. And I appreciate my parents standing against the mainstream of parenting ruts. *DISCLAIMER* I'm not attempting to judge anyone who thinks differently, I'm simply sharing my thoughts on the matter.

As a lady, and someone who wants to get married, and have a Godly marriage and family, and being a teenager, who's in "practice mode", I personally feel that, every day is an opportunity to "practice". This may need to be a several-post subject, (And it probably will be..) but I'll try my best to condense it. Biblically, men and women and children have special places in the family unit. One is no more important than the other. In God's eyes, we're all created, created equal, and we're all sinful people in need of His son's saving blood. All the roles, are important, but some simply come with more authority. (Such as the father being head of the household, leader of his family.) The woman is under her husband. She is submitted to him, and obedient to him.

Submission and obedience. Two words that leave a nasty flavor in the mouths of feminists everywhere. The ideas of both of these words are thought of as old school, and/or oppressive. And that's simply not the case when you think about how God set it up. Since I'm choosing to view teen hood as "trial run" I should be practicing these things, so that when God brings the right man into my life, I've got a good idea on how to be submissive and obedient to him.

I'm one of those girls, that when shown what's being withheld, I want it. And when given a taste of it, I want it even more. For example, when a child is shown to ice cream, they want it. And when you give them a bite, what do the want next? Another bite.

When I go on lengthy trips with my youth group, I get that small bite of "freedom". Sometimes when I get home, it's hard to put it all back under mum and pop; however often times, I wind up thanking them (maybe not always to their faces) for the boundaries they've set, the standard they've raised, and the accountability they provide.

But as a lady, when I desire that freedom, would it be beneficial or detrimental to me to move out of my parents house and remove myself from their leadership? Golly! You may as well just hand the kid the whole carton of ice cream at this point. Like I said, I'm not judging any girls who move out. I just know, that if I went to collage, and moved back, oh how ever so hard it would be, to be back under pop's authority. And as a girl, who wants to get married, and be submissive to my husband, if I moved out, got all that freedom, and didn't have to answer to or check in with anyone, when I got married, I would have to painfully reteach myself submission and obedience. I struggle with it, without that freedom. I intend to "practice" submission and obedience until my heart goes from pop to hubby.

And as far as the whole collage thing goes; I do truly want to be married, and have a family. And I don't want a career. For me, it would be foolish and unwise to spend thousands of dollars on an education. Because I would only be getting it to say, "I have a collage education". I wouldn't use it.

I'm not sure what God has in plan for my future. Do we ever? So for now, I'm just working through the rest of this year, and then through senior year. Taking it one week at a time, and praying through the future. I'm interested in event and wedding planning, and have found two great online courses that I'm considering. We'll see what God has in mind though :) As I've said; I don't want a career. Maybe just something to do for a few years.

God has it under control. And even though I had someone outright tell me "You're missing God's opportunities for your life by not going to collage. You're missing those relationships. That education. Those experiences. And you won't know how to function in some situations if you don't.", I don't doubt God's-greater-plan.

It's by faith, not by sight.

Ok...I'm done rambling your ears...or eyes...off.

~MadaLee